Welcome to Your Future

By: Salma Ahmed

Arts & Culture Editor 

I recently came to the realization that I will never be asked “So, what do you want to be when you grow up?”

From now on it will only be “So, what is it that you do?”

I never enjoyed being asked that but still, the fact that my future is now my present is very overwhelming. I can no longer create this imaginary future self who accomplishes all sorts of wild out-of-reach roals.

I am her now and she has done absolutely nothing so far.

This is the future i had so desperately feared since my preteen years.

The thought of getting to 20 was a mere fantasy, but now that it is on the edge of becoming a reality I am not any closer to accepting it.

Western movies have given me this false idea of an entirely independent adulthood at only 20, living in an extremely out-of-budget apartment with a killer view, basking in healthy stable relationships all around and with a secure dream job to boot.

The reality is that at almost 20 I am still as flawed as I ever was. The idea of independence is as equally terrifying as it is exciting. My chance at imagining what my future would be like is gone because this is it, very sad.

I am expected to settle down now that my education is nearing its end. But what is settling down, especially in my case of utter cluelessness and obliviousness?

Is this what I have been reduced to, my family’s trophy which they so desperately need to show off in front of their extended family and friends.

Is this it now? Working a 9 to 5 and on the search for a suitable bachelor. Do I even have a choice?

This is the adulthood I spent my childhood dreaming of.

I no longer dream and aspire. I only plan. The high hopes and childhood dreams were destroyed by such phrases as “be realistic” and “but you’re in Egypt.”

Is this what being an adult means? A hopeless, realist whose hopes and aspirations do not expand beyond the routine of a life settled.

Scroll, refresh. Scroll, refresh – an endless cycle has taken over my life.